Making safe sex sexier

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[Estimated reading time: 8 minutes]

Reviewing sex toys and prophylactics is made infinitely easier when you have awesome friends like the team at Nikki Darling. They're a kickass online retailer based in Australia whose ethics are as awesome as the products they stock. They provided Skyn Condoms and Glyde Dental Dams to Miss Smut Buttons in exchange for an honest review. Feel free to thank them by checking out their site

People...right now STIs are like sea levels; they’re on the rise. To make matters worse we’re now seeing the emergence of a treatment resistant strain of gonorrhoea. It’s a terrifying time to be alive and smooshing genitals with other people.

But all is not lost! For you see we have a wonderful catchphrase from the days of yore that we can fall back upon in these dark times…

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For many people, the idea of safe sex is a bit of a turn off. So much so that news of a new barrier method that's basically a bandaid for your pee-hole has taken over the media in recent weeks. Whether or not it will be effective in the prevention of STI’s remains to be seen. But it does prove is that there’s a demand for safe sex alternatives that don’t limit our ability to feel pleasure, while ensuring that we protect our vulnerable bits.

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So let’s take a look at some of the best safe sex options on the market that’ll help keep your genitals footloose and infection free. And while we’re at it, some ways that we can still maximise pleasure while staying safe.

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Condoms - Skyn

“Oh baby, I can’t use condoms, I’m allergic to latex.”

A lot of us have heard this line before. Sometimes it’s people who have a legit latex allergy. And sometimes it’s people who are kind of shit and just don’t want to use protection during sex.

Thankfully for latex allergy sufferers and safe sex advocates everywhere Ansell decided to be a bunch of legends and created a kickass range of condoms. The Skyn range is not only 100% latex free, but also an absolute pleasure to wear. The material they use, Polyisoprene, is designed to be softer than latex without compromising on strength. This means you get a more intimate sexual experience without sacrificing safety.

The Skyn Original is 2.08”/53mm in diameter and a length of 7.5”/190mm.

There’s also the Extra Large condom which measures 56mm in diameter.

Skyn condoms are without a doubt the best iteration of the traditional condom I’ve yet come across. You can buy them direct from the kickass kids over at Nikki Darling.

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Condom safety tips

Never reuse a condom.

If you start to put a condom on a penis and realise you’re putting it on the wrong way, you’ll need to throw it out and grab a new one.

Don’t use oil based lubricants with condoms. Oil based lube breaks down the materials used to make the condom and makes it more likely to tear.

While you can double up condoms, that can also increase the friction between the two, which will make them more likely to abrade and split. Basically double bagging doesn’t double your safety, just your condom bill.  

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Condom pleasure tricks

You can put a condom on with your mouth without compromising your health or safety. It’s a pretty neat trick to learn since it makes safety a little sexier.

If you apply a liberal amount of lubricant to the inside of the condom before using it, this will dramatically increase the amount of pleasure. This is especially true if you’re giving or receiving oral sex through a condom.

If you’re giving head through a condom, don’t be afraid to apply a good amount of flavoured lubricant to the outside of the condom. This will not only stop you from getting condom-mouth, but it will also make you salivate more, making it easier to glide up and down the penis without too much unwanted friction.

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Internal condoms - Femidom

Internal condoms are almost exclusively made by the brand Femidom. They look and feel like you’re shoving a rubbish bag up your vag. They’re not super sexy.

If a standard condom fits the outside of a penis, an internal condom fits the inside of a vagina. They’re large, rustley bags that you insert into your vagina and then your partner penetrates them.

They can technically be used anally, but studies have suggested that this may not be the most enjoyable orifice to have them in.

However! They’re incredibly useful in a number of specific ways.

If you’re a penis owner who is constantly complaining about the feel and texture of condoms, you might find that you enjoy the switch to internal condoms (if your partner is willing and able). Because they don’t grip your penis, they’re better able to simulate the feeling of unprotected vaginal sex.

My favourite use for them is during group sex. If a penetrator wishes to penetrate multiple partners in one session without stopping at each interval to change condoms, an internal condom provides a perfect solution. Each willing partner simply inserts one and the penetrator can move between them at will since there’s no longer any transfer of fluids on the outside of a condom. This works whether the penetrator is using sex toys, a penis or their hands.

The internal condom is a fantastic way to have safe sex with multiple partners and provides a great alternative to the traditional condom.

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Internal condom safety tips

The biggest risk with using internal condoms is the penetrator accidentally slipping into the vagina instead of the condom. Because the outside of the female condom is basically like folds and folds of rustled up plastic, it can be difficult to figure out where the right entry point is (especially in the throes of passion). So unless you’re both experienced users, it’s better to start off slow and safely at the point of penetration.

They can also be washed out and reused up to about 7 times, which can make them a more economic option than condoms.

When washing your internal condom, ensure that at no point do you turn it inside out - this would mean that it’s no longer safe for reuse.

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Internal condom pleasure tricks

Finding the right balance of lubricant with internal condoms is usually the difference between a mediocre experience and an exceptionally pleasurable one. If the hole it’s going into is too wet it can start to slip out. If the inside of the condom is too lubricated, the penis owner may lose sensation, because there’s no texture or friction left.

To ensure you’ve inserted the internal condom correctly it can be fun to use a sex toy to push it all the way in, and perhaps masturbate a little with it while you’re there to get you in a great mood.

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Dental dams - Glyde

Fellow vagina lovers and anus eaters we have fallen into a trap. We've been blinded by our love for the beautiful southern flowers and we've forgotten that they can be deadly venus fly traps!

This ignorance of ours isn't just limited to the occasional hetero hookup either, vast numbers of the LGBT community admit to having no idea how or when to use protection during oral. This is particularly worrying given how many communicable STIs can spring up from cunninlingus or anilingus. 

So if you’re looking to get busy on a beaver, remember to bring a dam! 

Going down on a vagina owning companion can be every bit as fraught with danger as intercourse. And don’t get me started on the problems that can arise from rimming.

Dental dams may not be the sexiest weapon in your sex arsenal, but they can prevent a myriad of infections. They’re especially important when rimming to help prevent Hepatitis and dysentery. You can protect yourself and your partner with a little help from the babes at Nikki Darling

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Dental dam safety tips

Wash your dam before use, especially if you notice a chalky white substance on the outside. Leave them to air dry before use.

Do not reuse dental dams.

At no point while you’re using it should you flip the dental dam over.

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Dental dam pleasure tricks

To enhance the receiver’s pleasure, apply plenty of lube to the vulva, or anus, before placing the dental dam down. It’s okay to re-apply more lube throughout, but remember to make sure it’s the same side that gets put back down. Again, never flip the dam after it has been used.

To enhance the licker’s pleasure, you can use a flavoured lubricant. You can also use other delicious food stuff (chocolate sauce, whipped cream, flavoured syrup, etc), as long as you make sure that none falls off the sides and comes into contact with any orifices. Using something flavoured can help to keep the giver more engaged and stops you from just tounging away at latex for half an hour.

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So there you have it dear readers, your guide to giving and getting some safe and satisfying sex.

Remember, safe sex doesn't mean it can't be fun and pleasurable. It's all about finding the protection that works for you, and enhancing the sensations (usually with lube)! 

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That is all.

You may go now.